What are your bridesmaid responsibilities?

So your friend/cousin/sister just asked you to be her bridesmaid. You may have mixed feelings of excitement and hesitation. I mean, how much is this thing going to cost?

You may be looking to buy your first home, save for a vacation, or have other financial goals you are working hard to achieve.

Bridesmaids play a significant role in supporting the bride before and during the wedding. Their responsibilities can vary based on cultural traditions, the bride’s preferences, and the specific wedding plans.

Emily Post’s great-great-granddaughter and co-president at the Emily Post Institute, Lizzie Post, tells us how you can ask what the actual dollars and cents are when it comes to wedding party participation.

Let’s first take a look at what may be expected of you.

Bridesmaid Responsibilities: Pre-Wedding Responsibilities

#1 Attend Pre-Wedding Events

Bridesmaids often participate in several pre-wedding events that help celebrate and prepare for the wedding. Here are the key pre-wedding events that bridesmaids may be involved in:

#2 Engagement Party

  • Purpose: Celebrate the engagement of the couple.
  • Bridesmaid Role: Attend the party to show support and celebrate with the couple. Occasionally, they might help plan or set up the event.

#3 Bridal Shower

  • Purpose: Honor the bride with gifts and well-wishes.
  • Bridesmaid Role: Help plan, organize, and host the shower. This can include sending invitations, decorating, and coordinating games or activities. They also attend the shower and assist the bride with gift opening and recording who gave each gift.

#4 Bachelorette Party

  • Purpose: Celebrate the bride’s last days of being single with a fun, often more casual event.
  • Bridesmaid Role: Plan and organize the party, which might involve coordinating travel, booking venues or activities, and ensuring the event aligns with the bride’s interests and preferences. They also attend and participate in the festivities.

#5 Dress Shopping and Fittings

  • Purpose: Help the bride choose her wedding dress and ensure bridesmaid dresses fit properly.
  • Bridesmaid Role: Accompany the bride to bridal salons for her dress selection and fittings. They also need to attend fittings for their own dresses.

#6 Rehearsal Dinner

  • Purpose: Conduct a practice run of the wedding ceremony and enjoy a meal with close family and friends.
  • Bridesmaid Role: Attend the rehearsal to understand their roles and responsibilities during the ceremony. They also participate in the dinner, which is an opportunity to relax and socialize with the bridal party and family.

#7 Wedding Planning Meetings

  • Purpose: Discuss and finalize wedding details and logistics.
  • Bridesmaid Role: Occasionally attend meetings to provide input on bridesmaid dresses, event themes, or other aspects where the bride seeks advice.

#8 DIY and Craft Sessions

  • Purpose: Create decorations, favors, or other wedding-related crafts.
  • Bridesmaid Role: Help with creating DIY wedding items. This can be a fun and collaborative way to prepare for the wedding.

#9 Beauty and Wellness Preparations

  • Purpose: Ensure everyone looks and feels their best for the wedding.
  • Bridesmaid Role: Participate in beauty treatments such as manicures, pedicures, facials, or spa days arranged by or for the bride.

#10 Pre-Wedding Brunch or Luncheon

  • Purpose: Celebrate with the bridal party and sometimes close family members before the big day.
  • Bridesmaid Role: Attend and enjoy the event, which is often a more relaxed and intimate gathering.

Bridesmaid Responsibilities: Wedding Day

Now for the big day!

On the wedding day, bridesmaids have several important responsibilities to ensure that everything runs smoothly and that the bride is well-supported. Here are some possible key wedding day responsibilities for bridesmaids:

#1 Getting Ready

  • Arrive on Time: Be punctual and ready to start the day early, often several hours before the ceremony.
  • Assist the Bride: Help the bride with her hair, makeup, and getting dressed. Provide emotional support and keep the mood light and positive.
  • Stay Organized: Keep track of personal items and any essentials the bride might need throughout the day, such as her phone, makeup for touch-ups, and emergency kits.

#2 Pre-Ceremony Photos

  • Be Photo-Ready: Ensure you are dressed and prepared for any pre-ceremony photos.
  • Assist with the Bride’s Dress: Help with adjusting the bride’s dress, veil, and train for photos.

#3 Ceremony Duties

  • Procession: Walk down the aisle as part of the wedding procession, either alone or paired with a groomsman.
  • Stand at the Altar: Stand beside the bride during the ceremony, often in a designated spot.
  • Hold Items: Hold the bride’s bouquet during parts of the ceremony or the groom’s ring if asked.
  • Assist with the Dress: Help arrange the bride’s dress and train as needed, particularly when she moves or turns.

#4 Post-Ceremony Responsibilities

  • Photo Sessions: Participate in post-ceremony photos with the bridal party and family.
  • Reception Line: If there is a receiving line, greet and welcome guests alongside the bride and groom.

#5 Reception Duties

  • Bridal Party Entrance: Participate in the grand entrance to the reception, usually introduced by the DJ or emcee.
  • Speeches and Toasts: Give a toast or speech if asked by the bride. Often, this is the role of the maid of honor, but other bridesmaids might also be asked to speak.
  • Encourage Dancing: Help get the party started by encouraging guests to dance and enjoy themselves.
  • Assist Guests: Help direct guests to their seats, assist with questions, and generally ensure everyone is having a good time.

#6 Throughout the Day

  • Support the Bride: Be available to assist the bride with anything she needs, whether itâ€